I am a psycho

Sitting in my cubicle,

staring at the product development tracking sheet

sipping from the strong mocha - in the company's mug -

trying to remember the metrics and formulas

I think of you,

of how fucked up I am,

of what a mess my life is.

I come here,

and I stare at the posts

thinking to myself

what the hell is wrong with me

I feel sick

and I leave.

Then there's a though, a phrase, an issue

and I come back

and I write.

This one took an hour to finish

I deleted the whole thing 4 times I guess

and the rewrote parts of it

and now it's what you see

a multi-digested vomit

of an illusionist...